Thursday, August 18, 2011
It's Not Goodbye, It's See You Later...
If you have friends or loved ones in the military, you know that they hate "goodbyes". I learned this years ago. Whenever another one of my friends gets deployed, I always say "See You Later". Some people think this is silly, but for the service member, it's a big deal. It's the equivalent of telling a performer "Good Luck". You'd never say that. They'd rather be told "Break A Leg".
The reason I bring this up is that I had dinner with Matt a few nights ago. I was pretty sure I knew what he wanted to talk about, but I tried to stay positive. We sat down and ordered and there was a few seconds of silence. He looked at me and reached for my hand. "I am getting deployed in October, with Travis," he said to me. I couldn't hide my disappointment. Matt had told me it was a possibility, but he just got back last December, so I was kinda hoping he wouldn't have to go back again until next year.
Matt told me that he's going back to Afghanistan. He tried to make me feel better by saying that it's a lot "safer" out there now than when he was there last year. I know it's still quite dangerous there because of my other friends who are deployed at the moment. His deployment is set to be for 7 months, but he was told to be prepared for up to a 9 month tour. I felt sad and scared for him. I always go through these emotions. I know that this is the life of a service member and I should just be used to it already since I have military friends. But honestly, it never gets any easier and I don't worry any less.
Matt is going home to Wisconsin for 2 weeks in September. He asked me if I wanted to go with him. I was a little shocked that he'd ask me. I told him it would probably be impossible for me to get off of work and that I didn't currently have the extra funds to buy a plane ticket. He told me to ask my boss anyway for the time off and that if I wanted to go, he'd cover my plane ticket. Matt told me how I was one of his best friends, even without all the sex stuff. We talked about the last 3+ years of our friendship and it is crazy to think we've known each other for so long. It was a very sincere moment between us.
I asked my boss about taking time off and he said he'd rather I not go on vacation because we have some very important things coming up the next couple of months. But my boss said that because of the situation with Matt getting deployed, he would be willing to give me 10 days off. I still haven't decided yet if I want to go on this trip. It would be nice to have 10 days to spend with Matt, considering I won't see him for at least 7 months. But I also don't want to complicate things between us. We have a good thing going as fwb and I'd hate to ruin that. I don't know. I told Matt I'd let him know my decision by the weekend. Either way, I can't help but think about how much I will miss him. But it's never goodbye between us. I know I'll see him again. And we still have 2 months to have lots of sex and make memories to carry him through his deployment. :)